It isn't about me anymore...

A friend of mine was talking about all of the things she wishes she could have done before having her son. Traveling... partying... college... etc... And I have read countless stories about young mothers having the same feelings. Even going as far as dumping their kids on relatives and babysitters, so they can go out every weekend. I understand wanting to have a social life. Believe me, I do, but it isn't about me anymore. It hasn't been about me since I first found out I was pregnant.

Pregnancy. There are tons of books and research done on the topic, but you never get the full story. For some women, pregnancy is a dream. No pain, no morning sickness, just the joy of feeling your baby grow and move. For others, like myself, it isn't such a walk in the park. Frankly, being pregnant sucked. Morning sickness is a terrible little devil that doesn't always go away and strikes any time of day or night, not only in the morning, as the name suggests. Heartburn is a beast and no amount of tums can take it away. Joint pains, waddling, backaches, headaches, feet swelling, not to mention being the size of a whale, are just a few of the other things expecting mothers can look forward to. However, it really is all worth it.

As a mother, no matter the age, we get to experience the purest form of love and adoration. despite the stretch marks, weight gain, lack of sleep, our children see us as the most beautiful, amazing person they have ever met. We are Moms. We have the least and highest paid job out there, but it is definitely the most important. We get to experience life first hand. Hearing it, seeing it, feeling it. We know that love at first sight, or even before actually meeting, is truly possible and so very strong. I won't lie, I cried like a baby when I first saw and held my little guy. It was literally the happiest, most surreal moment of my life. In the hospital, I kept looking over my shoulder thinking that the nurses were going to come in and say, "Just kidding, we'll take him back now." Obviously, I knew that wouldn't happen, but it did cross my mind.

Watching my little guy grow and learn is the most amazing thing I have ever seen. He astounds me every single day with new information that he's picked up. One thing I will say is that they really do pick up everything. It isn't always a good thing. Its been 3 wonderful years since Monster man graced us with his presence and despite not getting as much sleep as I would like, I wouldn't change a thing. Being a working mother, going to grad school online, and trying to manage a household make it very difficult to do everything I would like to do with my life and my family. However, my son has everything he needs and is learning the value of an education. I think its worth it. He is worth it. I will be forever grateful for having my son when I did because he has truly show me how amazing life can be.

Surviving College with a Toddler

There are a lot of moms in my grad school classes and there were a lot in my undergraduate studies, as well. I find it incredibly inspiring and empowering to hear their stories and to know that I am officially one of them. Another question I am asked often, is how I juggle school, work, and a 3 year old. Let me tell you, it is definitely not a walk in the park. However, it really isn't as difficult as it sounds.

I am a firm believer in the saying, "If you want something bad enough, you'll do everything to get it." Its completely true. Another cliche sounding statement that keeps me going is that, it isn't about me anymore. It never really has been. I grew up in a single parent household with a mom struggling to provide the essentials. I told myself that I would never let my son go without. That doesn't mean he will be a spoiled brat that gets everything he asks for, but it does mean that he will get what he needs. This means that I need to be more qualified than the next person in order to get the best job. Which, in turn, requires more schooling. It really isn't about me anymore. I want to be a provider. I want my son to have a childhood and to not have to worry about money. I don't want him to have to be disappointed about not getting Christmas or Birthday presents because I can't afford it. He will want for nothing, but he will also know and come to appreciate hard work.

So, some ways that I stay sane and keep trucking on while going to school with a toddler are: I find time for myself. Whether it is putting in headphones and listening to my favorite music, working on my couponing, a hot shower, it can really be anything that works for you. I know its hard to find time for yourself amongst the chaos that is life, but it is imperative to your sanity. Another thing that helps me stay organized is having a personal planner AND a wall calendar. I really like the planners that have the calendar and the the sections for each individual day. It allows me to write down every assignment's due date and when I am going to complete those assignments. I can also take everything day by day or look ahead, if need be. I make it a habit to write down every assignment, reading, discussion post, etc as soon as I have access to the syllabus. It works out pretty nicely and I rarely have all-nighters.

I also try to make it a habit to only do homework when my monster is sleeping or preoccupied with a game or some sort of activity. Obviously, that isn't always an option, but it definitely helps. Due to work, the time I get to spend with monster man is significantly diminished, so I have to spend as much time with him as possible. He's only 3 once. In just a short year, he will be starting preschool and I don't want to have any regrets or missed opportunities. So, I tend to go to be a little later than I want to or I take advantage of any down time at work. If I have free time, at all, when my little guy isn't with me, I do homework. That way, I can be present when I'm home.

My methods won't work for everyone, but I hope they help shed some light on what student/working moms do in order to give their monsters their undivided attention when they are home. Hope this helps! How do you stay organized while trying to juggle everyday life?

Finding Myself, My Family, My Passion

Hey guys!

I am super sorry I have been M.I.A. the last few months. I have been dealing with a lot of personal issues and decisions and I just could not find the time to update. So, here is a little update for you all now.

I started working for a housecleaning company that really took advantage of its workers. You were paid $10/hr for regular clients, minimum wage for new clients, and you weren't paid for driving time. I got paid for about 15 hours a week, but I was gone for about 40 with driving time. I had to sit back and reevaluate my life and where it was headed. I have a Bachelor's degree in Family and Human Development and I am currently attending Grad School for Professional Counseling. Arizona was not working out for my family and I, so we make the big leap (one state over) to Northern California. We had a lot of setbacks getting here, but we finally made it.

We could not be happier. I have had to figure out the new coupon policies and go out of my comfort zone, once again, to make friends. However, I was just hired as a Behavioral Skills Therapist making really good money and the husband was just hired at Dish. We still have a ways to go to really get where we want to be, but at least we are moving forward. I feel lighter than I have in years and my family seems to be a lot less stressed out.

Now I just have to find a good daycare, find another hobby, make new friends, and so on. Life just doesn't seem to be as daunting as it was just a couple of months ago.

Lovely little update

Hey guys! Sorry I am so bad at posting. I'm still very new to this whole blogging thing and some personal thins have been coming up, preventing me from staying up to date. I just started my Master's program in Professional Counseling at GCU, so I decided to pick one day a week to have a new post. I figure, if I put it in my calendar, along with my assignments, its more likely to get done. This is my form of a "mental health break" during a busy academic week. Any suggestions for posts are always welcome, especially since I want to research things that you guys actually want to read about. Bear with me as I figure this beautiful art of blogging out:)